That being said, yeah I am pretty much in the Forever företagets webbplats alone club right now too, so I’m not judging. Just sharing my thoughts.
Vincs
I feel you. I’m 26, and well, I’ve had people interested in me, but not very many. I’ve never loved anyone that was obtainable for me either! Stupid crushes, honestly.
It is such a lonely and painful existence at times. To not have that person with you, there, physically. Especially since we are romantic types. I’d assume you love hugs. I do.
This is why I’m trying. At least.. to become more spiritual and work on myself. They say if you achieve spiritual enlightenment, or have a close relationship with God, then your carnal mind dies, and you achieve a spiritual mind.
Which the spiritual mind triumphs the carnal mind, because it is unconcerned of such “earthly” matters. It cares about the whole, it loves unconditionally, it is no longer “worldly”, it has become only benevolent.
As I understand you, that’s exactly it! I do try to be more spiritual, more emotionally neutral, but that’s very difficult for an INFP.
My opinion is that INFPs can be prone to self-defeating attitudes when they are feeling that way. If they feel hopeless, they are prone to seeing the world as hopeless. ENFPs may be similar, and both types are also known for being nice and friendly, but some of this may be that we know what it’s like to hurt so we try not to hurt others most of the time.
Sometimes being optimistic and friendly and trying to see the best in things is hiding a more tragic attitude that we don’t want to show to others, but that can still affect our thinking and possibly be bad for us to keep inside and never examine.
This idea about unattractive physical features seems fallacious to me. I’ve seen you post a pic and you look fine. And also there is no rule that one must look perfect to attract someone.
When you meet people who are older than you, have various other features that are not seen attractive etc. and you see they are happily in a relationship, this excuse about appearance no longer seems valid.
Maybe if we just want to stand there like a light post and just have people flock to us, but that’s unrealistic anyway–you must get out and meet people and I also think that’s the other problem INFP have with dating–we don’t like to do that. We want to just sit in our livingroom while prince charming walks in the door somehow, only then we’d just pepper spray him and call the cops because that would be weird as fuck. So it’s not logical or realistic.
So I think INFPs need to remember not to embrace self-defeating attitudes about themselves when they are feeling bad. Perhaps it’s Fi’s nature to filter through eh perception information and lay on our extra layer of meaning, and if we are very depressed or overwhelmed, we don’t lay on the correct meaning and it can end up pessimistic and self-defeating, and a self-fulfilling prophesy.
That being said, yeah I am pretty much in the Forever alone club right now too, so I’m not judging. Just sharing my thoughts.
AliAnne
34 years recently, like any good INFP I am by nature rather reserved and introverted, but sympathetic At the moment I chew a little black because although having succeeded in my professional career with a job that I love, I feel a great empty in my personal life. The worst being my romantic relationships with the opposite sex, it’s nothing .